is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
When are your genitals available?
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize