Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I think people are normalizing furries
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
