It's Friday. Sex?
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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