The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Randomize
