I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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