he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
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