But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
