THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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