yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
