i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
