Your face is a jimmy john
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
