I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
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