Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
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