Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
