i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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