All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
