Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Enjoy the penises
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
