I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
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