Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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