you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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