I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
