i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
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