Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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