Don't you send me to vm
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Randomize
