Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
We left the knife in your bed.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
