too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
