i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize