We're facebook friends in real life
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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