There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Randomize