he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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