Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
