in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Why is your signature on my underwear?
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
