so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
P.S. I can't hear my feet
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
my being single is dangerous.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Randomize
