Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(727): View more from Florida

My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo

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(416): View more from Ontario

I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.

(1-416): View more from Ontario

u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u

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(615): View more from Tennessee

Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low

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(541): View more from Oregon

its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.

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(518): View more from New York

his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"

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(703): View more from Virginia

keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.

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(718): View more from New York

I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.

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(772): View more from Florida

Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?

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