The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
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