so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
