Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I have fence marks all over my body
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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