If that was your dad, he is hot
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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