i already hear my dad disowning me
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
