Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
