Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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