no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
