Having a random hookup so left but love u
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
