Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Randomize
