I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
