the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Floor bacon is actually really good
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
