just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
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