Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
