i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Randomize
