Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
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