Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize
